Are you in a relationship? Single? Married? Well, you’ve come to the right place! My Edge Magazine recently hosted a relationship panel featuring Terry and Kimberly Johnson, Jayden, and Hayley Croft, along with marriage counsellor, Yvonne Kraemer from Crossway Life-care with a masters in Marriage and Family Therapy. If you missed out on this spicy panel, don’t stress because we’re here to summarize it all for you!
Let’s get started, the night began with introductions. Kimberly and Terry were dating for four and a half years before they got married, and that was 29 years ago! Jayden and Hayley were dating for three years before they got married, just a year and a half ago! #newlyweds Our couples at two different stages of their lives, had so much good advice to share from dating, marriage, sex and finances, nothing was off the table.
Yvonne Kraemer shared with us a few tips and tricks to help us recognize some red and green flags when dating. For example, some characteristics of a successful relationship include having respect and admiration for each other as well as looking at the positives in the other person. An unsuccessful relationship was described as a disconnection, treating one another with disrespect. Yvonne highlighted that trust is essential in having a successful relationship, and this can be found in the little things such as the way a couple speaks to one another, accepting one another for who they are, listening to one another and allowing each other to grow. Healthy couples are accountable to each other, are able to self-reflect and forgive one another.
Our couples talked about how to keep God at the center of their relationship, they emphasized that praying together, reading the Bible together and making decisions together with God was key. Each couple acknowledged that when they are doing well with God on a spiritual level, their family relationships also thrive.
When dealing with conflict our couples talked about active listening, having empathy, and validating the other persons feelings. While no one can be perfect, knowing your partner and their personality, recognizing how they think is the first step to working out how to deal with conflict, in a healthy manner.
When it comes to sex and intimacy, our couples didn’t hold back! They covered the lead up to the wedding night and the importance of seeking advice from trusted people, encouraging those of us who have never been married to not be afraid to ask the awkward questions in premarital counselling. So, what does it take to maintain intimacy with your partner? Terry Johnson talked about the importance of intentionally setting time aside for date nights, and for intimacy whether that be physical or psychological and for those of you with kids, talk about it! Don’t be afraid to let your kids know when you’ve set time aside for you and your partner and of course, don’t forget to lock the door!
So, you’re newly married, and you’ve moved in together, how do you navigate household roles? Jayden and Hayley Croft shared some life saving tips for us! They covered the importance of defining your roles, and recognizing that as a couple, you don’t have to do things the same way your parents did. It’s about recognizing that you both are different and playing on each other’s strengths, working together as a team, and holding each other accountable when you start to default back to how you used to live at home.
Our couples were asked what they wished someone had told them before entering into a relationship, they shared that it takes time and hard work to be in a relationship. It’s okay that people and circumstances change. A relationship is a journey where two individuals grow together. It’s important to make the most of birthdays, anniversaries, and other special dates because these are the memories you will reflect on the most and time goes quickly.
The panel came to an end with some advice from our couples as to what to look for when entering into the dating phase. They emphasized that it’s important to figure out what your non-negotiables are and have three core things that you will not consider in a person you’re dating. It’s important to know yourself, if you don’t know who you are, you won’t know what you’re looking for.
Thank you to the team at My Edge Magazine for hosting and thank you to the couples for giving us insight into their lives and sharing great advice! We can’t wait for Relationships Uncensored 2023!
You can watch the panel here.
